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Clip from the best South Park....EVER

Those damn celebrities are dropping like flies to the Church of Scientology (and I use that term lightly). The voice of Bart Simpson, among others in The Simpsons, gave $10 million last year and was given some crappy award, the inscription probably said something like, “Hey, good job, you just wasted $10 million”. Just as a point of reference for that kind of donation, Tom Cruise has only given $5 million the past 4 years combined. However, he does make creepy videos that get leaked onto YouTube.

You might be asking yourself who were the other lucky winners of the night. Well good thing I read the article. Nancy Cartwright (Bart Simpson) took home the elusive Patron Laureate Award, Kristie Alley took home the Diamond Meritorious Award and Priscilla Presley spent $50,000 of Elvis’ money to take home the Patron Award (Elvis is really proud that his wife is a Patron of Scientology).

So, kids, if you would like an award from an upstanding organization like The Church of Scientology get out your checkbook…write lots of zeros, otherwise you will get stuck with the Patron Award.

Not So Exclusive---Tom Cruise pitches Scientology!!

This is a gold mine of hilarity. I guess there has been a video floating around the World Wide Web about Tom Cruise pitching his incredible religion of Scientology. Finally someone with big enough rubber testicles has decided to post it. If you follow that link at the top, then you will see what I am talking about. It was on YouTube and Google Video however the fine folks over at Scientology decided that they didn’t want it up and threatened those sites if they didn’t take them down.

The guy that runs Gawker.com decided that this was too news worthy to take down. As he says…if Tom Cruise jumping on Oprah’s couch was an 8 on the crazy scale…this is a 10. If you have time watch the entire video. I wonder why if the people at Scientology are so excited about their religion and Tom Cruise as their spokesperson why they want to suppress this video? I am not going to lie…after watching this video I am pretty convinced to make the switch.

You may be asking yourself why I would be willing to do that. Well it is with logic like this (about a minute into the video):

"Being a Scientologist, when you drive past an accident, it's not like anyone
else. You drive past, you know you have to do something about it, because you
know you're the only one that can really help."

Right on brother…right on. There are so many times when I see EMT’s on the scene of tragic accidents and just feel sorry for the victims because I know those EMT’s (who are trained in emergency medicine) aren’t Scientologist and they aren’t giving the proper treatment. What they really need is some midget celebrity to suck some thetans out of them.

Also, about 4 minutes into the video Cruise speaks of SP’s (no, not sexual predators) but “suppressive persons” and laughs like Hillary Clinton when asked a tough question. This is hilarious and should be watched by anyone that has ever wanted to make fun of Tom Cruise on a higher level. Don’t be worried about the insane level of acronyms he uses. Here is a list of what they mean:

SP—Suppressive Persons
KSW—Keep Scientology Working
PTS’s—Potential Trouble Sources

There are a couple other ones but I couldn’t write them down fast enough…if you catch them you can post a comment and let us know so we can talk the lingo of Scientology. Here is the link again just in case you missed it up top. I would probably go look at it quickly because you never know when he might have to take it down. Enjoy it…this is an early Christmas gift.

Scientology (The Celebrity's Religion)

Scientology, what a religion. Founded by science fiction writer, Ron L. Hubbard it is the religion for the stars. I think Southpark did a pretty good job of shedding light on the Scientologist beliefs and Xenu.

Below is a video of 48 hours mystery which tells the story of Elli Perkins. Elli was a Scientologist who had a son that showed signs of strange and disturbing behavior. We all know that Scientologist do not believe in solving mental disorders with medication, but instead using their own methods of treatment.

Elli's son suffered from schizophrenia and started to believe his mom was poisoning him. After a failed suicide attempt he went on to kill his mother. It is a sad story and one that you would think could have been avoided if the son was given proper treatment.

Below is the video of her story which appeared on 48hours Mystery. It is kind of long, so you may want to watch when you are bored in your hotel room, or something.

Video Link