Blind Item of The Weekend

What newlywed marketing executive does not make good on $5 bets he makes with certain party goers? After discussing the Missouri vs. Oklahoma last night the amateur college football analyst entered into a foolish bet with two seasoned college football pros (some call the younger of the pros the next Kirk Herbstreit...only better looking).

After taking Missouri over Oklahoma the oldest son of three went on to say things like "oh do you need change" and "I can break a $20."

Suffice to say when the dust had cleared and the mighty Sooners stood victorious in San Antonio our naive newlywed was nowhere to be seen. This morning while goodbyes were being said he could be heard asking his beautiful wife, "hey B do you have any money"...which she responded with, "I will not support your foolish betting any longer" (I am not entirely positive this conversation actually happened but it makes my story sound a lot better). Instead of having a delicious Quizno's Sub today on the way home...the smart bettors were only left with Triscuit crackers.

Blind Item of the Week

This is a special Mother's Day edition of the Blind Item of the Week. Before we get to it, we would like to extend a very Happy Mother's Day to all of our readers who are mothers but especially to our own mother who brought us into this world so we could post at D&F (I know she is so proud).

What soon to be international high school graduate and future X-man once ruined Mother's Day by refusing to give his own mother the gift pictured to the left because she made him clean his room instead of watching Pokemon on Mother's Day, thereby denying her the chance at the title "World's Best Mother."


The heated exchange happened as so:

Mother: Will you please clean your room?
X-man: I am watching Pikachu fight Bulbasaur
Mother: Please clean your room
X-man: (going to get the present and showing it to mom) THIS IS WHAT I WAS GOING TO GIVE YOU, BUT NOT ANYMORE!!! I HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY. HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!
Mother: (sobbing, sobbing, sobbing)

I for one know that our mother is The Worlds Best Mother however she does not have the trophy to prove it to her friends because of a certain someone. All because of Pokemon. Disgraceful.

Blind Item of the Week

What recent Sigma Cum Laude college graduate is a big fan and big proponent of Pay Day loans? What’s worse is that this wannabe Charles Schwab graduated with a Finance degree. If you happen to be riding with this person hope that you don’t drive past a Cash Advance store because if you do you will be listening to a 5 minute narrative about the wonderful attributes of Pay Day Loans. He looks at these stores as if he is looking into the eyes of his one true love, and this reporter believes they are a match made in heaven. This college graduate swears up and down that he will be visiting these stores once he gets his first pay check (which is long overdue) because as he puts it, “It is a great way to get some extra income for when I want to go out to eat, or when I want to buy that extra copy of the Macarena or Backstreet Boys CD.”

The love and affirmation doesn’t stop there, he is also trying to recruit other people to share the same feelings he has about these sharks. His younger brother has already been brain-washed into believing these loans are the best thing since sliced bread. This is absolutely disgusting.

Blind Item of the Week - Allegedly

What prominent, poised, and professional Assistant District Attorney has a not so professional e-mail address? If you want to seek advice from this Attorney at Law you had better turn off your Internet filter and be prepared to send an e-mail to, buttkiss@... We have yet to determine if this ‘handle’ represents a way to make it to the top by sucking up to the powers at be (also known as brown-nosing), or if this is some kinky fantasy the Assistant D.A. likes to partake in during her free time. Either way we are disgusted.

We would be remiss in our obligations if we did not also mention this startling fact we found while investigating this piece. An unnamed source close to the story spilled his guts and his tears when he said he has been verbally abused by this person a number of times. The most recent incident occurred yesterday when he asked “buttkiss” to pick up some Up Dog at the store. Her not so kind response was, “What the #@*! is Up Dog?” The only answer we can give is, not much, what is up with you?

Blind Item of the Week

What former high school Baseball letterman embarrassed himself during his first softball game over the weekend?!? This two time letterman, who was so gifted and talented that when he finished his High School baseball career his coach was so taken aback he was moved to tears; not only showed up late to the game (almost causing the team to forfeit) but he also made a horrendous throw that left him embarrassed and left his teammates questioning his abilities.

It all started with a routine ground ball to third base. The former high school standout fielded it cleanly and that is where things started to fall apart. He intended to throw the ball to second base to force out the lead runner. However, instead of the ball reaching second base, it reached the outfield somewhere between second and first base (approximately 90 feet from where it was intended.) The looks of disgust and amazement that a throw could be that awful showed on everybody’s face. One onlooker was quoted as saying, “It looked like he was throwing an eephus pitch to the right fielder!”

Many speculated this athlete was “special” and was given a chance to play because of the coaches’ generosity. However, this reporter learned the truth, this man was not special, he was simply feeling the effects from an all night bender which included Cosmos and beer pong.

I am sorry to say we were unable to find video footage of this play, but I will provide this video of the Mayor of Cincinnati throwing out the first pitch of the Reds 2007 season. After watching this, just know the throw we described above was 10 times worse.

Blind Item of the Week

What Neo-Natal Nurse Practitioner caused quite a social faux-pas this weekend when she went on a five minute diatribe accusing a person she just met of being a big NERD. That’s right sources close to this reporter tell the story that this femme fatale just met this poor unsuspecting gentleman and at the moment he was about to say that he was a fan of the television show Battlestar Galactica she went off. Saying such things as, “Nerd...hey Dwight Schrute...you have no life” and many other things that are not fit for print on this family friendly web-site. The unnamed man was left speechless and quickly excused himself from the conversation. Clearly to go and wipe off the tears that he shed after hearing such harsh words directed towards him.