Bobby's Rant of the Day

As some astute anonymous commentator has pointed out, I tend to be somewhat of a stickler when it comes to grammar. I'll blame my 8th grade English teacher who tirelessly drilled the fundamentals of the English language into my head. For the most part, I let the little stuff go - so you mistake "your" (indicates possession) for "you're" (you are) - no big deal. Hell, even I have to religiously use spell check lest everyone I know find out I'm dyslexic.

I do, however, have a problem with people who use non-words and / or create words in an effort to sound smart (people who use words incorrectly falls into this category as well). The absolute quickest way to convince me you are an idiot is to use a word that does not exist. Second place goes to people who spend time discussing inane shows like The Hills, The Real World, Chaotic, and anything involving Paris Hilton. Mind you - I said discuss, not watch, because even yours truly digs on VH1's "Fabulous Life of.." series. I digress.

Irregardless. It's not a word. Not only is it not a word, it's a double negative. People who use this non-word in an effort to sound smart drive me absolutely crazy. Not just because it's not a word, but by using it, you show me that you simply do not comprehend the English language. I work with several people who learned English as a second language, and while they have some syntax problems (putting verbs in the wrong place, randomly throwing Spanish words in with English, or pronouncing English words with Spanish rules - Bojangles becomes Bo-hangles) they don't use non-words.

I'm not perfect; nor do I expect everyone to be perfect all the time. I'm sure while I was in a less than sober state I have used non-words or switched words in a sentence around (I swear to green that light was God), but if you repeatedly use "irregardless," I'm sorry - you are an idiot.

That's all for now.

Word of the Day

The man pictured to the left is disgraced Durham, NC District Attorney Mike Nifong. As most of you know he ruined three young men's lives by charging them of raping a crazy stripper. Anyway, the case was dropped yesterday and now hopefully the wrongfully accused can get their lives back on track. I will help with that by inviting them all to be guest bloggers on D&F. We don't pay anything and only get 4 unique hits a day but it is a resume builder.

Now to get to the word of the day. Dennis Miller was on FoxNews last night and would like Nifong to be turned into a verb. So we are doing our part. The Word of the Day is "nifonged". Meaning to really screw up, especially while speaking of other peoples lives. Synonyms are schruted, screwed, and bucknered. An appropriate use in a sentence is:

"Man, he really nifonged the game for us."

Try to use it today and your friends will be impressed.


--thanks to Bobby for giving us the heads up on this

WHAT STOCKS??!!??

This is a public service announcement:

Do not ask Bobby about his stocks...he will get very defensive and angry and will say "WHAT STOCKS??" (all caps signify yelling)

This leads the humble writer of this blog to believe that Bobby is involved in insider trading. Call the law.

Thank you.